Past and Present

Reconciling the past with present is never easy.

While wishing that I had remained celibate, my body thirst for physical pleasure. Lust coils around my resolve like a serpent; squeezing the life out of it…almost. At this junction, I still retain a morsel of sanity. Through St Augustine I learn the value of spiritual fulfillment and the importance of avoiding corruption. The veil that cloaked my relationship with God begins to quiver as I start to question the purpose of my existence. Surely I am not in this world to purely experience physical pleasure. Physical pleasure that numbs the senses and subsequently the brain.

I begin to look heavenwards.

Lord God, with all the sins that your children have committed, how can you ever forgive them? If men were to give birth, how topsy curvy would this world be in the future? I always forget that life is a divine treat and I always end up taking it as a given. Nevertheless, I begin to realize the value of humility and right now, I am submitting myself to the forces of nature.

Guide me.

I shall listen and act according…but pray, guide me, oh Lord.

Broken Glass

sieving through past memories

of biting pleasure and sour pain.

i came across broken glass

a mistaken step and a faltering eye

tells me that i’m wandering away from the divine.

it cuts and pierces

yet rejuvenates and awakens.

all of a sudden i’m back to life

with ruby studded tears as my guide.